Breathe and Smile

After a couple of really cold, miserable days the sun came out today. I was busy making breakfast when the pink rays of the winter sun dawned through the window. It was amazing. All around in the distance the mountain tops are covered with snow, but we did not have any wind so the day progressed into a beautiful mild winters day.

It also seems like I am finally rid of the flu which was pestering me for the last 2 weeks, so joy all around. I finally feel balanced again. Almost back to happy. I am not an overly happy person and do tend towards negativity sometimes, but this little person growing inside me has engulfed me in a cloud of happiness, not crazy happy but rather a deep feeling of contentment. I guess struggling for 5 years to conceive has wind me up like a spring and when those 2 lines appeared the spring released, set me free.

I do worry a lot about our parents. This being in limbo and not knowing what the future will hold for either my MIL or step-dad is really not easy. But I found that even through the worry I smile.

Each time I feel the baby move I smile. It happens more regularly now and every time I am in awe. That there is actually another small human being inside me that moves... someone that I already love more deeply than I ever thought possible. Someone that I have prayed and hoped and dreamed about for a very long time and at long last created! Isn't that just the biggest miracle? I do hope that as we get to raise our daughter that I will always remember the way I feel now. That even through the tough days, I will be able to be still and appreciate her, and remember to smile.

Hubby and me are off to our first Prenatal-class tomorrow about which we are very excited. It is definitely getting more real now as we are already at the point where we are preparing to bring our little girl safely into this world.

Bright orange Aloes in the garden - yip winter is here!